“Separation”- is it “Selfish” or “Sacrificing” of simply fear?
March 26, 2012
Separation is a considered a bad word, something no right thinking mind would wish for, it is yet one of those realities of our lives that we can not abandon, no matter how much we wished, we did. We sperate or part ways at many junctures in our lives , it will not be wrong if we say life is nothing more than a couple of separations and a couple of associations, it however has remained a less talked about or desired subject. Well my views on it aren’t any different from your’s except the fact that I sometimes do consider it “acceptable if avoiding is inescapable”!
“The guy I know” holds divergent views on the subject and unlike most times when we together think things out he wishes to chart out an individual line of thought but in here I’m not choosing “separation” , I agree to serve my wine in the glass of his line of reasoning , neither is he in for separation and we agree to say cheers – we get on to our discourse.
To ascertain if “separation” is desirable or not, it is essential that we examine what causes it in greater details. So , here is my take, would like to broadly categories my views in below two variants.
1 ) Separation is “selfish” – When we sperate to associate with something else, it is largely seen as selfish but isn’t it true that most associations are based on some or the other kind of separation? If we didn’t sperate from school , we couldn’t have joined the collage, a no to separation from collage wouldn’t have allowed us to associate with the work career – so is it truly selfish ? the answer is, it is not ,it is only progressive not selfish, when it is being supposedly done for one’s betterment.
2) Let’s take the other view – Separation is Sacrifice – Is it really is ? Perhaps yes , no matter how short, tough or sweet ,long an association is, it is always difficult to part ways and when we do it at the cost of our will, it indeed qualifies to be called sacrifice. Most of us loved our school ,collage etc but scarified it all for a better tomorrow.
Both of the cases appear true when linked with positive betterment , but there are many separations that life forcibly makes us, a part of, that in true sense of the word, tears us apart. Yes, you guessed me right, it is when we have to separate from people we wish to be with , people we love, people we care for – in some unfortunate cases it is a reality and this form of septation is truly the most complex and cruel in nature.
Why people choose to part ways when they were the ones who put their heart, mind and soul in creating a common path for themselves ? What possibly causes it ,has remained an unsolved puzzle and will always will be one, we are however trying to link what appears common among causes. Breathing with someone we are separating with becomes difficult despite of plenty of fresh air in the common space , every separation starts with disagreement, followed by inherited want of both parties to be proved on the right side of logic in the disagreement, when one of the two is pragmatic the situation dissolves to nothing sooner than soon , but when both parties stand for their beliefs of what they consider to be the right side, disagreement paves path for discussion/argument and that gives birth to Fear of looing and/or fear of accepting other’s version of right , and from here distances of meters , become miles and finally a day comes when people part ways. Honest people part ways as unhappy and mischievous as happy but both undergo the test of fear.
That preciously is my take – It is fear that causes separation.
And to all those of you, who are going through it, my only submission is try to be together for life isn’t fun separated.
The guy I know, seems convinced and we move ahead. On that note wish you well.